I’m into Spoken Word Poetry. Lately, nahihilig akong umattend ng mga monologues and poetry reading events here in the metro. Mahilig akong mag-follow sa mga spoken word artists. Hindi dahil sa OTWOL. Nagsimula ito nang matagpuan ko si Sarah Kay sa Youtube with her piece “When Love Arrives”. Simula noon, kapag may gustong kumawalang emosyon sa loob ko, nailalabas ko ito sa pamamagitan ng pakikinig ng mga spoken words and poems online. Maraming hindi nakaka-gets kung bakit ko ito kinahiligan. Hindi lang naman dahil sa puro hugot ang makukuha mo dito. I just love how they played with words na tumatagos sa puso kahit anong ilag mo. I love the soothing calmness na nararamdaman ko kapag pinapakinggan ko sila.
So here, let me share to you one of my most favorite piece. Bago matulog, kapag gusto kong kumalma ang diwa ko, pinapakinggan ko siya. Masarap. Masakit.
I wish for you to have amazing sex with her every night!
I wish she does everything u tell her to, bend her body in angles her bones are not accustomed with, wont tell u to stop,wont ask you to be gentle…
I hope you feel like coming home to a whore. I hope she feels like she has nothing to offer but this, no warmth, no orgasms that quake more than the muscles, no quiver… joint souls, no lovers intertwined.
I wish you read long letters to her which she does not understand. I wish she becomes the cliche in your poems because you have nothing else to write about.
When the only wetness u are swimming into is a stagnant pond of algae,
you will remember how you wished i was your river, how we flowed into the ocean to be as wide as the horizon. You will remember how the moon reflected tales of lovers in our eyes and how we tried to be them.
You will know that sometimes it is important to fight, make your voice shake the ground the nieghbors press their ears to the floor anticipating for something tragic..
You and i are tragic lovers.
We both know that.
But aren’t the most tragic stories also the most epic?
Didnt juliet swallow death?
Dont we all ingest poison everyday to prove we are the brave ones who love and asks for nothing in return, even if all you want is to be loved in return..even what we are, are dried up bodies tying to hydrate dried up souls.
Lover, we live in a generation where people rejoice in brokenness..
make ugly beautiful,make curses sound like promises..
“Stay a little bit longer”
“I love you but i cannot leave her..
Stay…but not a little bit go pick her,
tell her how she uncomplicates wanting,
tell her how you understood exactly what she meant when she asked you to love her.
Tell her that there arent oceans you’ve had to swim across just to reach her bossom,
Tell her that there arent any nights that you cried beside her, just because the thought of losing someone so fragile terrifies the fuck out of you
Tell her that the reason why you hold her hands is because your palms feel empty..
Tell her that you have forgotten how it feels to dance under street lamps…
Tell her that her body needs nothing more but another body,
tell her she makes everything feel easy…
Show her your calloused hands and tell her how you struggled with me,
show her the bloodstains on your skin and convince her that you tried to rinse them off..
Tell her i never loved you anyway..
and convince yourself that i never did,
Lover, when i told you my body couldnt bend in angles my bones arent accustomed with,
i was inviting you to not be rigid..
i was asking you to understand that sometimes,
bodies do not need force, just need presence, just need touch..
Pick her.. allow her to marvel in the beauty you discovered in darkness..
Allow her to unclench ur fists.
Allow yourself to discover gentle..
and be that..
Tell her to be everything you want her to be…
while wishing she was me..